Learning to argue in an intelligent

It is not necessary to arrange the proceedings, as they say in hot pursuit. If you are upset and angry, then before you begin a serious discussion or clarification of relations, come to the normal calm state. Psychologists recommend to remove negative emotions, that is, to produce steam. Ask how to do this? Modalities are many: punched his fist on the pillow, tear to shreds the paper or mentally, imagine that the offender is before you, and you express to him all that think of him. Also effective way: to present themselves in the field or in the mountains and poorat heartily. The main thing - do not be shy and do not stop halfway.

Try to choose the time and place suitable for such conversations. Of course, there are times when a wave of emotion covers with his head, and we are no longer able to resist it .. However, it is best to make every effort to quarrel, and under favorable conditions. Do not begin a serious discussion, if anyone of you feel bad or somewhere hurry.

Do not swallow the insult, boldly share your complaints and grievances. Try talking first-person. Phrases uttered by a first-person, doing miracles, because you talk about their feelings, and quite unimportant, they are negative or positive. No need to "poke" to his companion. This may seem to him as an attack or accusation of anything. And as you know, for men it acts as a red rag to a bull. In response to you or also attacked, or will be quietly excuses. In short, the desired dialogue will not work.

Do not go to the person that you only add fuel to the fire and get away from your problems, solutions for you at this moment together.

Be honest, upload your feelings to the other party just as they are. For example, if you have something to piss out yourself, then you should not say something like: "I was not very pleasant." False words, you will feel both at once.

Try not to generalize, to avoid statements like "you never", "you always", "you're not", etc. Such phrases only infuriate your dear friend.

Move away from conflict - is a slow but sure way to destroy even the strongest relationships. If you're always going to pretend that you all - well, that nothing has happened that you are all fine and well, despite the fact that the brawl at odds - you will notice that very soon, your meetings will become a rarity, the calls will stop and eventually end relationship.